Sigh im so over feeling shit


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Reasons I don't believe you.

He was still calling me sweetie pie the day he broke up with me. I'm confused as to why he would call me that still if he didn't care.

Why did he say that he would keep the photo of us on display. What mind fuck game is he playing. How can the photo mean something but the relationship mean nothing.

Why the weekend before the fight did he SMS me what are you doing. When I was chatting to another guy at a club.

down

I don't understand why i'm upset today. Yesterday I was happy, the day before that I was happy. Why today on a day that means no significance.

I do miss him and what we had and I hate the fact he could love me completely then just not. But it doesn't make me understand why i'm in a down mood today.

Sorry

I realise why you fell out of love with me. I smothered you. But I only did it because you cheated and I'm sorry.

I can do better

I can do better

someone with a job.

someone who returns the kind things I do.

Someone that knows what love is and doesn't question it.

Someone with a higher IQ

but at the end of the day these things only make me feel better because they put you down.

At the end of the day I want you. For who you are even if thats a selfish prick right now who gave away the best thing that ever happened to him

i just

I only just realized I'm in love with you.

At first I thought it was an emotion that I had the power to control.

However when I tried to move on, it was like no matter what was offered to me, it wasn't enough. There was always something missing, something wrong. I had lied to myself for so long, but truth be told I still wanted you.

It was then I realised when I couldn't move on, yet didnt want to push forward. Im stuck in limbo.

All I know is I love you.

And I can't believe it took this for me to realise what I had been doing wrong, I had you and then I lost you.

I know neither of us did anything right in the relationship we both had our flaws. I openly admit I smothered you but I only did it to get over your act of infidelity.

It hurt like a dagger when you said you didn't love me anymore. It confused me when your actions spoke otherwise. And it killed me to know you only came to the decision of being unhappy with me by your mates planting the idea in your head.

I pray for a chance for you to realise you still love me.